Nighttime Personalities Target Trump's Controversial 'Gold Card' Visa Scheme

Television's top entertainers used their airtime ridiculing ex-President Donald Trump's just launched visa program, called the "golden visa," portraying it as a obvious pay-for-access system for the wealthy.

The Late Show's Pointed Spin

Kicking off his show, Stephen Colbert presented a sardonic Christmas song about the commander-in-chief. "He's making a list, checking it twice, before handing that list to the agents at ICE," he crooned. "The President ... destroys each thing he touches."

The focus was the controversial program that permits international citizens to acquire U.S. residency for an investment of $1 million dollars, or "premium" option for $5 million. An official website pledges approval "with unprecedented speed."

"A quick message here to rich immigrants: prior to you fork over the cash, have you considered Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He noted that the scheme is also designed to "get cash" from firms wishing to hire foreign workers, with hefty payments. "That is a lot of fees, but if you enroll, you also get a complimentary stay at a property of your choice – as long as it's the that one hotel," he said.

"Unprecedented screening the U.S. government has ever done," said Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to ensure these individuals completely are eligible to be in America."

"That is important, you gotta prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "The initial query: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Commentary

On his late-night show, Jimmy Kimmel referred to the initiative the "Get Into America Express Card."

"This is a card that will let wealthy foreigners to live here," he explained. "For a million bucks, you get legal resident status, you get a route to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one major crime of your selection."

"It might be time to update that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – never mind your poor masses. Pay a million bucks, you're in!" he added.

Kimmel mocked the simplicity of the form, observing it is "tougher to start a Wordle account." He said that Trump "sees citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak."

"Indeed, the finest people are the rich people," Kimmel quipped. "That's what Jesus constantly said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you give the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers on Affordability Issues

On another network, Seth Meyers addressed Trump's declining poll ratings during economic anxiety. "People gave Donald Trump a another term because they were mad about the economy," he explained.

This week, in a bid to discuss prices, Trump held a briefing in front of a display of food items, where he behaved oddly to some cereal.

"Lovely packaging, I think I'm going to take a few of them with me to my cottage and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a ages."

"He's so extremely weird," Meyers responded. "Like, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?"

Meyers finished by criticizing conservative media defenses of Trump's financial performance. "Maybe rather than complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy like what FIFA did," he laughed.